#ProjectBerry65 came about when I started my lifestyle change in 2016. At first, I told myself I wanted to hit 65 kg again because it was my happy weight. The weight when I felt the prettiest – My size was just right that it’s a breeze to shop around because everything fits well. Collarbones, cheekbones & jawlines were visible.
I restarted the process but this time, no more Yo-Yo dieting and for the very first time, my desire to be fit was there. I don’t want SKINNY, I aim for STRONG.
After more than a year of lifestyle change, I’ve learned & accepted that there’s a whole lot more than the number on the scale and most important of all, those number should not define your self-worth. Let me explain it further below.
My photo on the left was the skinniest version (60 kg) of myself. Fast forward to 2015 comes the heaviest version of me. While 2017 is my transition towards the strongest version of myself.
So if the last time you’ve seen me was back in 2010-2011, itataga ko sa bato that you’ll say (or think na) “OH! SHE GOT BIGGER!“ Or maybe “AY OO! Lumaki nga siya, grabe!” And believe me, I’ve dealt with those exact words/reactions every.single.time. 🤣 There were times when you just have to remember that you gotta RESPECT the other person because if not, it can really get on your nerves. haha! Sarap sagutin di’ba? especially when they say “ANG LAPAD-LAPAD MO NA! ANONG NANGYARI SA’YO???”
But while I’m getting those (typical & not to mention very Pinoy) reactions, it got me thinking:
Do I have to always EXPLAIN & DEFEND myself? Should I always tell those people that I’ve already lost x number of pounds since my recent lifestyle change?
Should I tell them that I’m working out a lot?
Should I intentionally flex my arms, do the Show-That-Collarbone-Poseor that Hand-On-Waist Pose? Should I wear super fitted clothes?
I’ll be lying if I say I wasn’t affected by those comments, but then I told myself, NO. I should not be affected nor be defensive like always proving myself every single time. Why should I do that? I’m responsible for myself & choices and that’s all that matters.
This lifestyle change is not a show.
My health & fitness journey is a very personal challenge. 8 years ago, all I wanted was to BE THE SKINNIEST that I can be. But now, my goal is focused on having an overall healthy body. So whenever I get in these kinds of situation, when they see me not as slim as I was back in 2010/2011 and ask me what happened, I just smile and try to move on to the next topic because that’s all you can really do. Otherwise, you have to engage more and explain all over. Isa pa, it’s harder to explain especially when the receiver/s is really not willing to understand because they are focused on what the eyes can see. Kasi for some, you are either fat or slim and no in-betweens.
Screw the society’s standard and screw other people’s sharp tongues & unfiltered opinion. It’s always been that way anyway. People will always have something to say and we can’t please everyone.
Hindi tayo Nutella na designed to make everyone happy. If you’re going thru the same phase like me, try focusing more on your goals and not with what they say. I know that this is easier said than done, but this is why I keep saying that it’s very important to know & understand your WHY because that can make or break you. It also helps you stay focused.
Goodbye #ProjectBerry65, Hello #ProjectTonedBerry
So before 2017 ends, I’m officially letting go of my #ProjectBerry65 goal simply because I’m no longer after the number on the scale. Para man akong sirang plaka pero I’ll keep repeating this over and over that it’s always been about my overall health & fitness than the scale register. Yes, body weight matters but it’s also best if you got a better understanding of your body composition (water, muscle, fats etc).
This is just the first part of my 2018 plans that I’m gonna share later this month. What about you? Have you started listing your goals for next year? 😀
Read more about my Health & Fitness Journey here:
- The Girl Who Weighed 86 Kilos | This is My Fitness Journey
- There’s A Lot More Than the Size We Wear
- This is How My 52 Weeks of Lifestyle Change Looks Like
- Things I Learned After Doing the 100 Days No Junk Food Challenge